The best jokes about men

A man rushes out of his wife's hospital room. "Doctor, doctor -- my wife's been in a coma for several months, but when I just touched her left breast, she sighed!" "That's very encouraging," says the doctor. "Go back and touch her right breast. See if she reacts." A few minutes later, the man rushes out again: "Doctor, she moaned!" "Very good," says the doctor. "Now try oral sex. She should certainly react to that!" Five minutes later, the man comes out back out, white as a sheet. "Doctor -- she died." "No! What happened?" the doctor exclaims. "Well, doc," the man says tearfully, "she choked."
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: men
Men are like a fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something we'd want to have dinner with.
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: food, men, wine, work
Why didn't the husband change the baby for a week? Because the text on the nappies package said "18-40 lbs".
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: baby, husband, men
Boy will be boys but one day all girls will be women.
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: men, women
Men call us birds, is that because of all the worms we pick up?
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: bird, men
What do you call a take-out low-calorie meal for a cowboy? A Saddle Light Dish.
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: cowboy, food, men
Thanksgiving is the day men start getting in shape... to play Santa Claus.
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has 56.76 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, fat, men, Santa, Thanksgiving
Q:How many divorced men does it take to screw in a light bulb? A:None, the sockets go with the house.
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has 56.05 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: divorce, light bulb, men
Q: The male sex has two hobbies. What are they? A: His left hand and his right hand.
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has 55.91 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: masturbation, men, sex
What did God say after creating man? I can do better.
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has 55.90 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: god, men
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