Q: A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender.
Do you trust your fellow officers?
A: Yes sir, with my life.
What can a goose do, a duck can’t, and a lawyer should?
Stick his bill up his rear.
A lawyer and a basketball player want to make a deal.
Suggest a place where both of them would be happy to meet.
Of course, they should at the court.
Vote:
Q: What happens when a lawyer takes Viagra?
A: He gets taller.
Q: Why are there so many lawyers in the U.S.?
A: Because St. Patrick chased the snakes out of Ireland.
Q: What is the ideal weight of a lawyer?
A: About three pounds, including the urn.
How do you stop a lawyer from drowning?
Take your foot off his head.
Q: What do you call 400 lawyers at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean?
A: A great place to start.
A lawyer named Impos Syble was shopping for a tombstone.
After he had made his selection, the stonecutter asked him what inscription he would like on it.
“Here lies an honest man and a lawyer,” responded the lawyer.
“Sorry, but I can’t do that,” replied the stonecutter.
“In this state, it’s against the law to bury two people in the same grave. However, I could put `here lies an honest lawyer’.”
“But that won’t let people know who it is!” protested the lawyer.
“Sure it will,” retorted the stonecutter. “People will read it and exclaim, “That’s impossible!”
How do you stop a lawyer from drowning?
Shoot him before he hits the water.