Definition of a man with manners – he gets out of the bath to pee.
How can you tell when a man is well hung? When you can just barely slip your finger between his neck and the noose.
Why do men want to marry virgins? They can't stand criticism.
What did God say after creating man? I can do so much better.
What's the difference between a man and a messy room? You can straighten up a messy room.
Q: How can you tell when a man is dead? A: He stays stiff for more than two minutes.
How do you save a man from drowning? Take your foot off his head.
Why don't women blink during foreplay? They don't have time.
Q: Why are men so happy? A: Because ignorance is bliss.
Q: What is the difference between a puppy and a man? A: Eventually the puppy will grow up and stop whining.