The best phone jokes

Yo mama so fat she stepped on a weight machine and someone said "hey that's my phone number"!
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: fat, phone, Yo mama
When Chuck Norris calls 911 it's to ask if everything is ok.
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has 54.31 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone
Pavlov walks into a bar. The phone rings, and he says, "Damn, I forgot to feed the dog."
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has 54.15 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, dog, phone
An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her situation to the dispatcher: "They've stolen the stereo, the steering wheel, the brake pedal and even the accelerator!" she cried. The dispatcher said, "Stay calm. An officer is on the way." A few minutes later, the officer radios in. "Disregard." He says. "She got in the back-seat by mistake."
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has 53.18 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: car, cop, phone
What do you call an iPhone that isn't kidding around? Dead Siri-ous.
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has 53.18 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: IT, phone, technology
Chuck Norris was about to die... until the Grim Reaper phoned in sick.
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has 53.01 % from 77 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, phone
Chuck Norris put his phone on air-plane mode and flew it.
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has 52.97 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: airplane, Chuck Norris, phone, travel
Why is the Apple still reporting record profits from iPhone sales? Because iPhone users are just as oblivious to the looming recession as they are to the people around them.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: IT, phone
Every mobile phone user has complained like this: Don't text me while I'm in the middle of texting you, because now I have to change the whole text.
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has 52.91 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: IT, phone
Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11... a suicide.
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has 52.04 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, cop, death, phone
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