I was going to tell a chinese joke, but it's just wong.
An American was hopelessly lost in the Highlands and wandered about for nearly a week. Finally, on the seventh day he met a kilted inhabitant. "Thank heaven I’ve met someone," he cried. "I’ve been lost for the last week." "Is there a reward out for you?" asked the Scotsman. "No," said the American. "Then I’m afraid you’re still lost," was the reply.
Why is life like a box of fruit? Because when they go bad, they go black!
What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? Polaroid's.
Why are niggers afraid of chainsaws? Because when you turn on a chainsaw it says "Run nigga nigga nigga Run nigga nigga nigga"
How do you starve a black person? Put their food stamps under a job application.
Q: How do you piss off a white person? A: Call him a racist.
A US Border Patrol Agent catches an illegal alien in the bushes right by the border fence, he pulls him out and says "Sorry, you know the law, you've got to go back across the border right now." The Mexican man pleads with them, "No, noooo Senor, I must stay in de USA! Pleeeze!" The Border Patrol Agent thinks to himself, I'm going to make it hard for him and says "Ok, I'll let you stay if you can use three english words in a sentence. The three words are 'green,' 'pink,' and 'yellow.'" The Mexican man thinks , then says, "Hmmm, okay. The phone, it went green, green, green. I pink it up and sez yellow?"
What do you call Black people running down a hill? Jail break.
What do you call a mexican who's lost his car? Carlos.