The best school jokes

Q: What comes before 8? A: My school bus usually.
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has 71.86 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: school
In clas: 1+1=2 Exam: John has four apples and gives one away. Calculate the mass of the sun.
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has 71.80 % from 125 votes. More jokes about: school
Early one morning a mother went to wake up her son. "Wake up, son. It's time to go to school!" "Buy why, Mom? I don't want to go." "Give me two reasons why you don't want to go." "Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me, too!" "Oh, that's no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready." "Give me two reasons why I *should* go to school." "Well, for one, you're 52 years old. And for another, you're the PRINCIPAL!"
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has 71.64 % from 356 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, school, student, teacher
Q: What do dogs do after they finish obedience school? A: They get their masters.
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has 71.53 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: animal, dog, school
Pupil (on phone): My son has a bad cold and won't be able to come to school today. School Secretary: Who is this? Pupil: This is my father speaking!
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has 71.37 % from 197 votes. More jokes about: dad, kids, school
A college pizza delivery boy arrived at the house of Larry Johnson. He delivered the pizza to his trailer. After giving it to him, Larry asked: “What is the usual tip?” “Well,” replied the youth, “this is my first trip here, but the other guys say if I get a quarter out of you, I’ll be doing great.” “Is that so?” snorted Larry. “Well, just to show them how wrong they are, here’s five dollars.” “Thanks,” replied the youth, “I’ll put this in my school fund.” “What are you studying in school?” asked Larry. The lad smiled and said: “Applied psychology.”
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has 71.37 % from 220 votes. More jokes about: college, money, school
Little Johnny comes home and tells his daddy, "Dad, tomorrow there's a special 'Adults' evening' at school. Daddy is surprised, "Really? Special?" "Yes," nods Johnny, "it will be just you, the teacher, the headmaster and two police officers."
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has 71.34 % from 95 votes. More jokes about: cop, dad, little Johnny, school
A student visits the principal's office The principal asks: "What is your name?" The student replies: "D-d-d-dav-dav-david." The principal asks: "Do you have a stutter?" Student answers: "No, my dad has a stutter but the guy who registered my name was an asshole."
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has 71.29 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: school, student
"What shall we play today?" said Florence to her best friend Jenny. "Let's play schools," said Jenny. "OK!" said Florence. "But I'm going to be absent."
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has 71.25 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: friendship, game, school
I stopped understanding math when the alphabet decided to get involved.
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has 71.22 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: math, mean, school
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