What do you call men who use the pull out method? Fathers.
Man, to woman, ‘Am I the first man you ever made love to?’ Woman, ‘You might be. Now you come to mention it, your face does look familiar.’
What did the elephant say to the nude man? ‘It’s cute, but can it pick up peanuts?’
A tourist in Sweden is drinking in a bar when an attractive woman sits next to him. ‘Hello,’ he says. ‘Do you speak English?’ ‘Oh I speaking not much English,’ replies the woman. ‘How much?’ asks the man. The woman replies, ‘200 Kroner.’
Have you heard about the new super-sensitive condoms? They hang around after the man leaves and talks to the woman.
Q: What do you call a Republican politician who hasn't been connected to a gay sex scandal? A: Due.
Q: What do you call a ninety year old man who can still masturbate? A: Miracle Whip.
What happened when the blonde tried to give her boyfriend a blow-job while he was driving? They both fell off the motorcycle.
What´s the difference between a goodyear and a fucking good year? 365 condoms.
Yo mama's so fat that, after sex I rolled over twice and was still on the bitch!