The best sex jokes

A man goes to the doctor and says "I need birth control for my 10 year old daughter" The doctor replies "She's 10 years old and sexually active?" The man says" Active? Hell no! Most of the time se just lies there and cries."
Vote: has 51.70 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, doctor, age, sex
A man and his wife agreed on a code to use in front of their kids when they want to have s*x. The code is: "Making a call." One day the man ask his son to tell his mother, that dad wants to make a phone call. The boy returns to his dad, that mom says she is out of order. Then he ask him to tell her, that dad will go outside to make a phone call. The boy returns, that mom says, "If you do so, she will open a central telephone station in the house."
Vote: has 51.39 % from 37 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: marriage, wife, kids, sex, phone
Yo' Mama is so fat, after sex, she smokes a turkey.
Vote: has 51.34 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Yo mama, fat, sex, animal
An old man goes to his doctor and says, ‘Can you give me something to lower my sex drive.’ The doctor replies, ‘I would have thought at your age it’s all in the mind,’ ‘It is,’ agrees the old man. ‘That’s why I want it lower.’
Vote: has 51.31 % from 58 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
This 12 year old boy was in bed when he heard his mother moaning. He decided that he'd go see whats wrong with her. When he looked in his mothers room he saw that she was laying on her bed naked and rubbing herself and saying"I need a man, I need a man" So this quite a few times and then one night he heard his mother again, but this time her moaning sounded different, so he went to go check it out, this time instead of seeing his mother alone, he sees his mother in bed with a man. So the boy runs back to his room, strips all his clothes off, jumps on the bed and starts rubbing himself while saying "I need a bike, I need a bike"!!!!!
Vote: has 51.19 % from 154 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex, age, masturbation
My girlfriend likes to pretend to be a 14 year old when we have sex. I don't get it she will be 14 in a few years anyway.
Vote: has 51.15 % from 103 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Two sperm are in the body looking for the egg when one of them starts to wonder why it is taking so long. He asks the other sperm, "aren't we near the uterus yet?" "No," replied the other sperm, "we haven't even gotten to the esophagus."
Vote: has 51.12 % from 76 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Q. How can you tell a head nurse? A. She's the one with the dirty knees!
Vote: has 51.08 % from 60 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
If you're under the age of 25 and you think your life sucks then you better brace yourself.... Life has only given you the TIP of its Dildo.
Vote: has 51.01 % from 116 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex, age, life
‘I believe that sex between two people is a beautiful experience. Between five it’s fantastic!’ Woody Allen
Vote: has 51.01 % from 96 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex