The best sport jokes

Whats the difference between usain bolt and hitler? Usain bolt can finish a race...
Vote: has 70.82 % from 105 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: racist, Hitler, sport, celebrity
Everyone should stop hating on Lance Armstrong. He won 7 Toure De France's on DRUGS! When I'm on drugs, I can't even FIND my bicycle.
Vote: has 70.75 % from 128 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport, drunk, drug
Four nuns were attending a baseball game. Four men were sitting directly behind them. Because their habits were partially blocking the view, the men decided to badger the nuns hoping that they’d get annoyed enough to move to another area. In a very loud voice, the first guy said, "I think I’m going to move to Utah. There are only 100 nuns living there." Then the second guy spoke up and said, "I want to go to Missouri, there are only 75 nuns living there." The third guy said, "I want to go to Texas, there are only 50 nuns living there." The fourth guy said, "I want to go to Maine. There are only 25 nuns living there." The mother superior turned around, looked at the men, and in a very sweet and calm voice said, "Why don’t you go to hell, there aren’t any nuns there!"
Vote: has 70.43 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport
How can you tell a sumo wrestler from a feminist? A Sumo wrestler shaves his legs.
Vote: has 70.43 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport, women
Chuck Norris once won the Iditarod by pulling his team of dogs on the sled.
Vote: has 70.40 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, animal, sport
Chuck Norris doesn't throw a baseball, it just leaves his hand cowering in fear.
Vote: has 70.40 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sport
Paddy asks Murphy, 'Why do scuba divers fall off their boats backwards?" Murphy replies, "If they fell forwards they'd still be on the f*cking boat!"
Vote: has 70.18 % from 35 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport
A couple of years ago the english national team was about to start training in preparation for an important qualifying match when the manager at the time, Sven-Goran Eriksson, discovered a big turd in one of the penalty areas on the practice pitch. Ok boys, he said, who's shit on the ground? Emile Heskey replied: "Me coach, but I'm good in the air!"
Vote: has 70.01 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport, soccer
The water in Rio is so bad that even Usain Bolt had the "runs" in his last race!
Vote: has 70.01 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport
Chuck Norris walked his version of a 40-yard dash in 5.6 seconds; he was later told it was the Boston Marathon.
Vote: has 69.96 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time, sport