The best time jokes

Chuck Norris can literally kill time.
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Chuck Norris beat the light speed by 2 hours and 23 minutes.
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Q: What do you call a trial balance that doesn't balance? A: A late night.
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Yo momma's so old she knew the Virgin Mary when she was 10 and said Lil Mary will never amount to anything.
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Q: What's long and hard and full of semen? A: A submarine.
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In year 1272 Arabics invented the condom, using a goat's lower intestine.  In year 1873 the British somewhat reinvented the condom by taking it out of the goat first.
Vote: has 62.43 % from 68 votes. Send joke:

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Chuck Norris actually went to Rome by all roads. At the same time.
Vote: has 62.41 % from 9 votes. Send joke:

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Chuck Norris made time wait.
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Chuck Norris watched the first season of "24" in 5 hours.
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One attractive young businesswoman to another over lunch: "My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying."
Vote: has 61.50 % from 42 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, business, women, math, time