There was a tornado in my area the other day.
The sky was so black; it took my bike.
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Q: Why are native Americans effective strippers?
A: When they dance they make it rain.
It is so cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.
The July temperature in Joplin climbed over the one hundred mark.
Despite the scorching heat, Bozell was outside painting his house.
A passerby stopped for a moment to watch him and then asked, "How cum yer wearin' two jackets?"
"'Cause," said the redneck, "the directions on the can say ta put on two coats!"
Q: Why did Frosty the Snowman pull down his pants?
A: He heard the snow blower coming.
Yo Momma so fat, she rolled out of bed and everybody thought there was an earthquake.
On a Trans-Atlantic Flight, a plane passes through a severe storm.
The turbulence is awful, and things go from bad to worse when one wing is struck by lightning.
One woman, in particular, loses it!
Screaming, she stands up in the front of the plane.
"I'm too young to die, I want my last minutes on Earth to be memorable! I've had plenty of sex in my life, but no one has ever made me really feel like a woman! Well, I've had it! Is there anyone on this plane who can make me feel like a woman?"
For a moment there is silence.
Everyone has forgotten their own peril, and they all stare, riveted, at the desperate woman in the front of the plane.
Then, a man stands up in the rear of the plane.
"I can make you feel like a woman," he says.
He's drop-dead gorgeous.
Tall, built, with flowing black hair and jet black eyes, he starts to walk slowly up the aisle, unbuttoning his shirt one button at a time.
No one moves.
The woman is breathing heavily in anticipation as the strange man approaches.
He removes his shirt.
Muscles ripple across his chest as he reaches her, and extends the arm holding his shirt to the trembling woman, and whispers: "Here, iron this."
It only rains twice a year in Seattle: August through April and May through July.
There is no such thing as global warming.
Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.
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What is the similarities between a black girl, and a tornado?
They both suck, blow, and leave you homeless!
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