Thunder is caused by Chuck Norris rubbing the stubble on his chin.
Person 1: Global Warming doesn't exist. Chuck Norris was cold so he turned the sun up. Person 2: That's bullhsh*t! everyone knows Chuck Norris doesn't get cold!
There was a tornado in my area the other day. The sky was so black; it took my bike.
Yo Momma so fat, she rolled out of bed and everybody thought there was an earthquake.
Two blondes lock their keys in the car. One of the blondes tries to break into the car while the the other one watches. Finally the first blonde says "Darn, I can't get in the car!" The other blond replies, "keep trying, it looks like it is going to rain and the top is down".
What does an octopus wear on a cold day? A coat of arms.
Chuck Norris actually painted all of the colors of the wind.
Chuck Norris can create tornados by running around in circles.
Climate change is just Chuck Norris playing with the thermostat.
Chuck Norris can strike the same lightning twice.