The best jokes about women

What's the difference between a mosquito and a woman? When you slap a mosquito it stops sucking.
Vote: has 51.27 % from 51 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, women
Question: What’s worse than a male chauvinistic pig? Answer: A woman that doesn’t do what she’s told.
Vote: has 51.13 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women, animal
An old woman buys herself some bright red crotchless panties and goes home to surprise her husband. When her husband comes home, she calls him into the bedroom and points to her new panties. "Hey old timer," she says, "come and get some of this!" The old man says, "Hell no, woman. It done ate a hole in your drawers!"
Vote: has 51.00 % from 53 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, husband, women
Question: Why do women have smaller feet than men? Answer: So they can stand closer to the kitchen sink.
Vote: has 50.96 % from 46 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women
A man knocked on a door an a women answered and he asked if he could use her toilet. She said you have 3 chances, if you do 3 things wrong I`ll call the police. So he went to piss but on the flush chain there was a bra so he ripped it off. Then when he was walking down the stairs he saw her cat called Boobs on the step & he hates cats so he squezed it & then threw it up the stairs. He then went in the kitchen where the women was & the women said why did you throw my cat up the stairs? He said I don`t know. While she went to get it, on the table was a glass of milk which he then drank. When the women came back she said you had your 3 chances now I'm calling the Police. When the police came they asked her what the man had done. She said this man has ripped her bra off, squezed her Boobs and drank her milk.
Vote: has 50.70 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women
Women dream of world peace, a safe environment, and eliminating hunger. What do men dream of? Being stuck in an elevator with the Doublemint twins.
Vote: has 50.45 % from 9 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men, women
Why was the name "P.M.S." chosen ? Because "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken...
Vote: has 50.45 % from 9 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women
Question: Why do women close their eyes during sex? Answer: They can’t stand seeing a man have a good time.
Vote: has 49.93 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women, sex, time
Q: How do you know when a women's about to say something smart? A: When she starts her sentence with "A man once told me...."
Vote: has 49.61 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women
What do you call an open can of tuna in a lesbians apartment? Potpourri.
Vote: has 49.61 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women, lesbian, food