Where do you find a down-and-out octopus? On squid row.
Are shellfish warm? No they re clammy.
Q: Why don't they let Blondes swim in the ocean? A: Because they can't get the smell out of the tuna.
Customer: "Waiter, what’s the meaning of this fly in my tea up?" Waiter: "I wouldn’t know sir, I’m a waiter, not a fortune teller."
What do a walrus and Tupperware have in common? They both like a tight seal.
What does a cow like to do by a campfire? Roast Moosmallows.
What is a cow's favourite TV show? Dr Moo.
What is a moo hoo for a cow that fell into the thresher? Ground round.
What is a moo hoo for a delightful ranch owner? A charmer farmer.
I've just discovered a method for making wool out of milk. But doesn't that make the cow feel a little sheepish?