The best bible jokes

Look up "rib" in the dictionary and it says "To vex, irritate or annoy." Look up "rib" in the Bible and it says "Woman." Coincidence?
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More jokes about: communication, bible, women
Q: Which Bible character had no parents? A: Joshua, son of Nun (Joshua 1:1).
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More jokes about: bible, family, geek, IT
Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered. Getting back together, they discussed the gifts they were able to give their elderly Mother. The first said, "I built a big house for our Mother." The second said, "I sent her a Mercedes with a driver." The third smiled and said, "I've got you both beat. You remember how Mom enjoyed reading the Bible? And you know she can't see very well any more. I sent her a remarkable parrot that recites the entire Bible. It took Elders in the church 12 years to teach him. He's one of a kind. Mama just has to name the chapter and verse, and the parrot recites it." Soon thereafter, Mom sent out her letters of thanks, "Milton," she wrote one son, "the house you built is so huge. I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house." "Gerald," she wrote to another, "I am too old to travel any more. My eyesight isn't what it used to be. I stay most of the time at home, so I rarely use the Mercedes. And the driver is so rude!" "Dearest Donald," she wrote to her third son, "you have the good sense to know what your Mother likes. The chicken was delicious!"
Vote: has 82.21 % from 150 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: family, bible, parrot, food
Q: Where is the first tennis match mentioned in the Bible? A: When Joseph served in Pharaoh's court.
Vote: has 81.69 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: bible, sport
Q: Where is the first baseball game in the Bible? A: In the big inning. Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel. The Giants and the Angels were rained out.
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More jokes about: bible, sport, catholic
A man and wife were having argument about who should make the pot of tea in the morning. The wife told him that he should do it because he gets up first. The husband said that she was in charge of the cooking in the house, making it her job. The wife said that even the bible says that the man should do it. The husband told her to show him and if it did he would make it. She fetched the bible and opened up the new testament, showing him at the top of several pages that said "Hebrews".
Vote: has 81.69 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: marriage, work, bible, communication
"And so, God came forth and proclaimed widescreen is the best" Sony 16:9
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More jokes about: god, technology, bible
The visiting Bible school supervisor asks little Johnny during Bible class, "Who broke down the walls of Jericho?" Little Johnny replies, "I dunno, but it wasn't me!" The supervisor, taken aback by Johnny's lack of basic Bible knowledge goes to the school principal and relates the whole incident. The principal replies, "I know Little Johnny as well as his whole family very well and can vouch for them; if Little Johnny said that he did not do it, then I, as principal is satisfied that it is the truth." Even more appalled, the inspector goes to the regional Head of Education and relates the whole story... After listening he replies: "I can't see why you are making such a big issue out of this; just get three quotes and fix the damned wall!"
Vote: has 79.35 % from 195 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: little Johnny, school, religious, bible
Q: Did you hear about the the evangelical atheist? A: She went door to door with a book full of blank pages.
Vote: has 72.71 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: religious, atheist, bible
Who was the greatest financier in the Bible? Noah - he was floating his stock while everyone was in liquidation.
Vote: has 71.85 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: bible, money, death