The best Thanksgiving jokes

One day,little Timmy was at school and heard the word “shit”. He went home and asked his dad for the definition and he promptly told him “coats and jackets”. Timmy went to school the next day and heard the word “fucking”, and for a second time, asked his father what it meant. His father promptly said “cooking”. Then,he returned to school the third day and heard the words “bitches and hoes”. He went home and his father told him it meant “grandpa and grandma”. Later,on Thanksgiving night,his grandparents came over. Timmy answered the door with glee and says: “Hey bitches and hoes! I’ll take your shit to the closet cause dad’s in the kitchen fucking the turkey!"
Vote: has 84.78 % from 1052 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids, school, Thanksgiving, food
One day two very loving parents got into a huge fight, the man called the women a "bitch" and the women called the man a "bastard". Their son walked in and said "What does bitch and bastard mean?" and the parents replied "ladies and gentlemen". The next day the parents decided to have sex, the women said "feel my titties" and the man said "feel my dick". Their son walked in and asked "What does titties and dick mean?" and the parents replied "hats and coats". On Thanksgiving the dad was shaving and he cut himself, "Shit" he said, the kid came in and asked "What's that mean" and the man said it was the brand shaving cream he was using. Down stairs the mom was preparing the turkey, and she cut herself, "Fuck" she said. Once again the kid asked "What's that mean" the mom said that is what she calls stuffing the turkey. Then the door bell rang. The kid answered the door to his relatives and said "Alright you bitches and bastards, put your dicks and titties in the closet, my dad is upstairs wiping the shit off his face, and my mom is in the kitchen fucking the turkey!
Vote: has 82.31 % from 4692 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, love, sex, Thanksgiving, dad
One day, Little Johnny overheard his parents fighting. Later, he asked what "bitch" and "bastard" mean. They explained that they mean "lady" and "gentleman." The next day, he overheard his parents having sex. He later asked what "penis" and "vagina" mean. His parents explained that they refer to "hats" and "coats." At supper the next day, Little Johnny's mom cut her finger in the kitchen and yelled, "Oh f**k!" Little Johnny asked what that meant, and she said it means "cut." A week later, guests arrive for Thanksgiving dinner. Little Johnny welcomes them at the door, saying, "Hello bitches and bastards! Hurry up with your penises and vaginas we can't wait to f**k the turkey!"
Vote: has 79.36 % from 952 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: little Johnny, sex, food, family, Thanksgiving
Q: What is a turkey's favorite dessert? A: Peach gobbler.
Vote: has 78.80 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Thanksgiving, animal, geography
Q: What is the difference between Election day and Thanksgiving day? A: On Thanksgiving, you get a turkey for the day; on Election day, you get a turkey for four years.
Vote: has 70.01 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: political, Thanksgiving, time, ethnic, food
Thanksgiving Day was approaching, and a family had received a Thanksgiving card with a painting of a pilgrim family on its way to church. Grandma showed the card to her small grandchildren, observing, "The pilgrim children liked to go to church with their mothers and fathers." "Oh, yeah?" her grandson replied, "So, why is their dad carrying that rifle?"
Vote: has 69.96 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Thanksgiving, family, church
Q: Why should you never set the turkey next to the desert? A: Because he will gobble, gobble it up!
Vote: has 69.96 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Thanksgiving, animal, geography
Q: Why dont blacks celebrate Thanksgiving? A: Because KFC isn't open on holidays.
Vote: has 66.88 % from 1007 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, Thanksgiving, holiday
Q: What is the difference between a chicken and a turkey? A: Chickens celebrate Thanksgiving!
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, holiday, Thanksgiving
Q: What does Saddam want for Thanksgiving ? A: Turkey.
Vote: has 60.69 % from 38 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: terrorist, Thanksgiving, ethnic