Q: How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? A: None, that's a hardware problem.
Q: How many auto mechanics does it take to change a light bulb? A: Six. One to force it with a hammer and five to go out for more bulbs!
Q: What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb? A: You can unscrew a light bulb.
Two factory workers are talking. The woman says, "I can make the boss give me the day off." The man replies, "And how would you do that?" The woman says, "Just wait and see." She then hangs upside-down from the ceiling. The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?" The woman replies, "I'm a light bulb." The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off." The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?" The man says, "I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark."
How many lawyers dose it take to change a light bulb? 3, 1 to climb the ladder, 1 to shake it, and 1 to sue the ladder company.
Q: How many atheists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Two. One to actually change the bulb, and the other to videotape the job so fundamentalists won't claim that god did it.
Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: You wouldn't know, it's kind of an obscure number.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They just beat the room for being black.
How did the black guy escape from jail? He unscrewed the light bulbs.
Q: How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The lights out, how can u count them?