Hypocrisy: When a Jehovahs Witness doesn't celebrate Halloween because they don't like random people knocking on their doors.
It's Halloween and when the man answers his door, there's a well-dressed young boy there wearing a suit and matching tie, who says "Trick or treat". The man's a bit confused so he asks the boy what he's dressed up as. "I'm an IRS agent", says the boy, and with that, he snatches 40% of the candy, and leaves without saying thank you.
Q: Why aren't there more famous skeletons? A: They're a bunch of no bodies!
Michael: "What treat do eye doctors give out on Halloween?" Matthew: "I don't know. What?" Michael: "Candy corneas."
Q: How do you know your doctor is a vampire? A: He draws your blood from your neck with a straw!
Q: What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house? A: Hope it's Halloween!
Two monsters went to a Halloween party. Suddenly one said to the other, "A lady just rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?" The other monster replied, "Be a gentleman and roll them back to her."
On Halloween, children give Chuck Norris candy.
Q: What do birds give out on Halloween? A: Tweets!
Darth Vader wears a Chuck Norris mask for Halloween.
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