What kind of noise annoys an oyster?
A noisy noise annoys an oyster.
(Try saying that fast!)
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Q: What is a black cat's favorite color?
A: Purrrrrr-ple!
Q: What do you call cattle with a sense of humor?
A: Laughing stock.
A worm gets out from cherry compote and, after he stretches a little, says satisfied:
I love sauna!
Why do cows wear bells around their necks?
Because their horns don't work.
What did the judge say when the skunk was on trial?
Odour in court.
Chuck Norris can kill a Great White Shark by drowning it.
Vote:
Yo mama so ugly that when she delivered a little baby after birth the baby saw mum and screamed "It's a gorilla!".
The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
The cowboy was trying to buy a health insurance policy.
The insurance agent was going down the list of standard questions.
"Ever have an accident?"
"Nope, nary a one."
"None? You've never had any accidents."
"Nope. Ain't had one. Never."
"Well, you said in this form you were bitten by a snake once. Wouldn't you consider that an accident?"
"Heck, no. That dang varmint bit me on purpose."