Joke #1159

A blonde gets her haircut while wearing a pair of headphones. The hairdresser asks her to take them off, but she protests that she'll die without them. The hairdresser sighs, and starts cutting the hair around the headphones. Soon, the blonde falls asleep, and the hairdresser removes the headphones. A few minutes later, the blonde collapses, dead on the floor. Alarmed, the hairdresser puts the headphones to his ear and hears, "Breathe in. Breathe out."
Vote: has 71.38 % from 83 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, “Those are deer tracks.” The second blonde said, “No those are elk tracks.” The third blonde said, “You’re both wrong, those are moose tracks.” The blondes were still arguing when the train hit them. Emma: So, what kind of tracks were they?
Vote: has 56.86 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, animal
Chuck Norris Watches "the Nat.Geo. Specials" on Discovery Channel.
Vote: has 48.26 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde
Q: What is long and hard to a blonde? A: Fourth grade.
Vote: has 45.10 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, school
A blonde walks into a library and asks the librarian, "Can I have a burger and fries?" She replies, "Sorry, this is a library." The blonde whispers, "Oh, sorry. May I have a burger and fries?"
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, blonde, food
A blonde is standing in front of a soda machine outside a local store. After putting in sixty cents, a root beer pops out of the machine. She set it on the ground, puts sixty more cents into the machine, and pushes another button. Suddenly, a coke comes out the machine! She continues to do this until a man waiting to use the machine becomes impatient. "Excuse me, can I get my soda and then you can go back to whatever you are doing?" The blonde turns around and says, "No chance! I'm not giving up this machine while I'm winning!"
Vote: has 68.50 % from 60 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde
A blonde has been working in a broom factory since childhood, despite the state's strict anti-child labor laws, and has always been a good worker. But one day, she storms into her boss' office. "I quit! That's it, I'm not working here anymore!" "Why?" asks the boss. "What's the problem?" "I've been working here for so long that I've grown the broom bristles between my legs. I can't take it anymore." "Listen," the boss says. "That's perfectly normal. Look, I have those too." "Oh, my God!" she exclaims. "It's worse than I thought! You've also grown a broom handle!"
Vote: has 58.75 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde
Did you hear about the blonde who sold her car to get some money for petrol?
Vote: has 25.81 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde
We went to see a movie the other night. I sat in an aisle seat as I usually do because it feels a little roomier. Just as the feature was about to start, a blonde from the center of the row got up and started working her way out. “Excuse me, sorry, oops, excuse me, pardon me, gotta hurry, oops, excuse me.” By the time she got to me, I was trying to look around her and I was a little impatient, so I said, “Couldn’t you have done this a little earlier?” “No!” she said in a loud whisper. “The ‘TURN OFF YOUR CELL PHONE PLEASE’ message just flashed up on the screen and mine is in the car.”
Vote: has 85.49 % from 233 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, phone, car
One day three women went camping - a blonde, a brunette and a redhead. The blonde suddenly had to go to the bathroom. She went into the woods with her toilet paper and did her business. While she was gone, the brunette and the redhead decided to play a joke on her. They skinned a rabbit and snuck up on the blonde, put the guts behind her and ran back to the campsite. Three minutes later they heard a scream. Then they waited another half an hour and the blonde came back, sweating. She said, "I had to poop so hard I pooped my guts out. But thanks to God and these two fingers, I stuffed them back in."
Vote: has 73.37 % from 94 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, ginger, business, animal, god
What does a blonde in a supermarket bending over? Looking for low prices!
Vote: has 35.66 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, money