Joke #11975

Q: Why is Santa always so jolly when he comes to the UK? A: He can claim Gift Relief.

Q: Why does Santa have an accountant in the USA? A: So he can avoid Gift Taxes.

Q: What is Father Christmas's tax status? A: Elf-employed.

Four-year-old to her two-year-old sister: "Let's play Christmas. I'll be Santa Claus and you can be a present and I'll give you away."

This Christmas, Santa is sending a message to the naughty children to stop being bad. He stuffing their stocking with Chuck Norris!

Q: What do you get when you cross a pilgrim with a democrat? A: A god-fearing tax collector who gives thanks for what other people have.

Q: Why did the cannibal tax auditor get disciplined? A: For buttering up her clients.

Santa writes to Chuck Norris about what he wants for Christmas.

A man in Amsterdam feels the need to confess, so he goes to his priest. "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. During WWII, I hid a refugee in my attic." "Well," answers the priest, "that's not a sin."' "But I made him agree to pay me 20 guilders for every week he stayed." "I admit that wasn't good, but you did it for a good cause." "Oh, thank you, Father. That eases my mind. I have one more question." "What is that, my son?" "Do I have to tell him the war is over?"

Chuck Norris can build a Water Dam... In the Sahara Desert.

When we moved to the US I was 8 years old. I remember asking my father if I can have an allowance? When he asked me what that was, I said you're allowed to give me money.