Q: How do you be pro in clash royale?
A: Use rocket and rage spell ladies.
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Q: What do a woman and a bar have in common?
A: Liquor in the front, Poker in the back.
After his divorce Mr. Jones realized that poker isn't the only game that starts with holding hands and ends with a staggering financial loss.
George meets a genie in the street, which tells him to make a wish and it will make it true.
"I want to pee whiskey," he says.
“But are you sure? You can ask for money, wealth, anything you want."
"No I want to pee whiskey."
The genie thinks what can it do, it makes his wish true.
George goes home, calls his wife, Sue: "Woman, get nuts and two glasses."
Curious she was, she brings them.
"What do you want them? She asks him. Once we don’t have any drinks."
From now on, we will both have as much whiskey as we want, says to her.
And really he fills the two glasses with whiskey.
They clink, drink one, drink two drinks, make some fun … and play a little game.
The other night the same happen.
"Woman, bring two glasses and nuts."
So they spend their evenings.
One night, however, the scene changed.
"Woman, bring nuts and a cup."
"A, for one?"
"You will drink from the bottle today."
What would a computer geek is going to do after seeing a beautiful woman?
"Immediately start downloading it."
"What shall we play today?" said Florence to her best friend Jenny.
"Let's play schools," said Jenny.
"OK!" said Florence. "But I'm going to be absent."
Vote:
Black holes are where God divided by zero.
Chuck Norris bowled a perfect game...
While using a golf ball.
Vote:
My software never has bugs.
It just develops random features.
Chuck Norris once played with Legos.
The Ancient Egyptians still thank him for it.
Vote:
There were two church-going women gossiping in front of the store when a dusty old cowboy rode up.
He tied up in front of the saloon, walked around behind his horse, lifted its tail and kissed the horse full on its rectum.
Repulsed, one of the women asked, "That's disgusting, why did you do THAT?"
To which the cowboy replied, "I've got chapped lips."
Confused, the women continued, "Does that make them feel better?"
"No, but it stops me from licking them!"