Joke #3709

Law of Pill Rejection Any pill given to a cat has the potential energy to reach escape velocity.
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has 28.61 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: animal

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In year 1272 Arabics invented the condom, using a goat's lower intestine.  In year 1873 the British somewhat reinvented the condom by taking it out of the goat first.
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What do you call a gigantic polar bear? Nothing, you just run away.
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Q: What does an elephant use as tampon? A: A sheep.
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Chuck Norris was bitten by a cobra, cobra died after 5 days.
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Once upon a time in a nice little forest, there lived an orphaned bunny and an orphaned snake. By a surprising coincidence, both were blind from birth. One day, the bunny was hopping through the forest, and the snake was slithering through the forest, when the bunny tripped over the snake and fell down. This, of course, knocked the snake about quite a bit.”Oh, my,” said the bunny, “I’m terribly sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I’ve been blind since birth, so I can’t see where I’m going. In fact, since I’m also an orphan, I don’t even know what I am.” “It’s quite OK,” replied the snake. “Actually, my story is much the same as yours. I, too, have been blind since birth, and also never knew my mother. Tell you what, maybe I could slither all over you, and find out what you are, so at least you’ll have that going for you.” “Oh, that would be wonderful” replied the bunny. So the snake slithered all over the bunny, and said, “Well, you’re covered with soft fur, you have really long ears, your nose twitches, and you have a soft cottony tail. I’d say that you must be a bunny rabbit.” “Oh, thank you! Thank you,” cried the bunny, in obvious excitement. The bunny suggested to the snake, “Maybe I could feel you all over with my paw, and help you the same way that you’ve helped me.” So the bunny felt the snake all over, and remarked, “Well, you’re smooth and slippery, and you have a forked tongue, no backbone, and no balls. I’d say you must be French”
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What do you call an unusual rabbit? A rare hare.
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Chuck Norris likes his steaks still mooing.
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has 44.56 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
Q: Why is a blonde like a turtle? A: They both get fucked up when they're on their backs.
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has 52.38 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde
This stupid bug is appearing on a blasted line which would blow up the toilet. Then they go like "Tom tom tom tom" then back to the toilet and stupidly disgusted by a recently married woman and erecting a man in a toilet.
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If you crossed a cow with Michael Jackson, what song would you get? "Beeflt!"
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has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal, music