Hey dad, how do you feel about abortion?
"Ask your sister"
"I don't have a..."
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Me and my wife decided that we don't want to have children anymore.
So anybody who wants one can leave us their phone number and address and we will bring you one.
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What's the difference between a dead baby and a table?
You can't fuck a table.
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Q: How is spinach like anal sex?
A: Chances are if you're forced to have it as a child you are probably going to hate it as an adult.
Q: Why do old Jews have outhouses?
A: Because their afraid of the showers.
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how do you keep a black person out of your backyard?
Hang one in the front.
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Q: What do you call a 100 lack people in the ocean?
A: An oil spill
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Q: What did the cannibal do once he dumped his lady friend?
A: He wiped his bottom.
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Why are little girls better than little boys?
Because when you're finished using them as little girls, you can turn them over and use them as little boys.
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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Styrofoam cup?
A dead baby doesn't harm the atmosphere when you burn it.
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My wife beamed at me with pride and said, "Wow! I never thought our son would go that far!"
I said, "This trebuchet is amazing! Go get our daughter."
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