Chuck Norris finished Minecraft.
Chuck Norris can hear the sound of one hand clapping.
Chuck Norris is the reason why This Little Piggy cried wee wee wee all the way home.
Beetlejuice is afraid to say Chuck Norris 3 times.
Chuck Norris has no need for a TV remote. He stares at his television, until it changes the channel.
Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes. He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.
Chuck Norris tangled with Wolverine. He beat to him to a bloody pulp, then dared him to heal himself. Wolverine will not be in the next X-Men movie.
Evolution's driving mechanism is nature's desperate attempt to escape Chuck Norris.
A man is walking home when he sees a dog buying meat for his owner. The man watches the dog when the butcher takes a little to much and growls and him until he gets the right amount. The man follows the dog and watches as the dog stands on two legs and helps an old lady across the street. Amazed the man follows the dog home and watches the dog ring the doorbell. When the owner comes to the door the owner takes the bags and tells the dog to stay in the front yard. Frustrated the man goes up to the owner and yells "This dog is amazing! He gets your groceries, makes sure you have the exact change, helps old ladies across the street and this is how you treat him!" The owner replies, "I know but,this is the 3rd time this week he left his keys".
Yo' Mama is like a blimp: a huge spectacle that's full of gas.