Best jokes ever

Teacher: What's 2 and 2? Pupil: 4 Teacher: That's good. Pupil: Good? That's perfect!
Vote: has 63.79 % from 58 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids, student, school, teacher, math
The houseman invited over his boss and partners, for lunch. With them, his little 5year-old daughter was there. "Don’t you want to say the prayers before lunch, so Our Holly Father give us his blessings?," asks the father. "But... I don’t know what to say...," the little girl admits. "Just say what you heard your mommy say last time inside the kitchen!," said her mother to help her. And the girl: "Oh, God! Why in this life, my husband must invite all these people for lunch?"
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids, food, god, life, husband
A male driver gets stopped by police, and is asked: "Have you been drinking?" The man replies: "Okay, yes, I have... how did you know officer? Was I swerving across the road, or speeding?" "No sir," replied the policeman, "...nothing else can explain that fat ugly woman sitting next to you."
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol
The Sheriff in a small town walks out in the street and sees a blond cowboy coming down the walk with nothing on but his cowboy hat, gun, and his boots, so he arrests him for indecent exposure. As he is locking him up, he asks “Why in the world are you dressed like this?“ The Cowboy says, “Well it’s like this Sheriff… I was in the bar down the road and this pretty little red head asks me to go out to her motorhome with her. So I did. We go inside and she pulls off her top and asks me to pull off my shirt . so I did. Then she pulls off her skirt and asks me to pull off my pants…so I did. Then she pulls off her panties and asks me to pull off my shorts… so I did. Then she gets on the bed and looks at me kind of sexy and says, 'Now go to town, cowboy..' and here I am.” Son of a Gun, Blond men do exist.
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, cowboy, blonde
A Sunday school teacher asked her little children, as they were on the way to church service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids
Q: What will a giraffe do, if you spit in its face? A: It will kick off your ladder…
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
A little old lady sits at the luncheonette counter and orders a hamburger. The huge guy behind the counter bellows, "One burger!" Whereupon the chef grabs a huge hunk of chopped meat, stuffs it in his bare armpit, pumps his arm a few times to squeeze it flat, and then tosses it on the grill. "That's the most disgusting thing I've ever seen," the old lady says. "Yeah?" says the counterman. "You should be here in the morning when he makes the doughnuts."
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting
What do you call a mexican who's lost his car? Carlos.
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: racist, car, mexican
A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids
A guy gets out of the V.D. Hospital and decides to a hire a hooker, since he's been without for so long. Before long, he brings one home, and they have sex four times. After it's over, he turns to her and tells her he hasn't had sex in four months because of being in the V.D. Hospital. "How's the food there?" asks the hooker. "Because I'm going in there tomorrow!"
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, hospital, sex, food