What do you get when you cross a bunny with an orange? A pip squeak.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with an elephant? An elephant who never forgets to eat his carrots.
Why did the gray whale go on a diet? Because he wasn't a Fin whale.
Q: Where do blondes go to meet their relatives? A: The vegetable garden.
They've broken in my house so many times, they leave notes complaining about things: "The salt was low." "Pick up bread. We be back." Grease all over my stove they cooked and left the best chicken and dressing you ever want to lay your lips on.
A ham sandwich walked into a bar and the bartender said: "We don't sell to ham sandwiches." But the sandwich replied: "That's okay, I only want a beer."
Two cannibals just got their hands on a corpse. One says to the other, "I'll start at the head, you start at the feet." They start to eat, and after awhile the one at the head yells to the other one, "Hey, how's it going?" The other replies, "I'm having a ball!" Getting mad, the one at the head yells, "Dammit, slow down, you're eating too fast!"
How do you know you're at a bulimic bachelor party? When the cake jumps out of the girl!
What did the mother vampire say to her daughter when she picked up a tampon? "Honey, no in-between meal snacks!"
Yo' Mama is so nasty, she put a cucumber in her panties and pulled out a pickle.