"I have the body of an athlete." "Better give it back. You're getting it out of shape."
An elderly patient needs a heart transplant and discusses his options with his doctor. The doctor says, ‘We have three possible donors. One is a young, healthy athlete. The second is a middleaged businessman who never drank or smoked, and the third is an attorney who just died after practising law for 30 years.’ ‘I’ll take the lawyer’s heart,’ says the patient. ‘Why?’ asks the doctor. The patient replies, ‘It’s never been used.’
Peter: Why was the Olympian not able to listen to music? Matthew: Why? Peter: Because he broke the record!
The ladies say I'm like Usain Bolt in the bedroom... I usually wear a yellow and green vest.
Q: If athletes get athlete's foot, what do elves get? A: Mistle-toes!
A javelin thrower called Vicky Found the grip of her javelin sticky. When it came to the throw She couldn't let go. Making judging the distance quite tricky.
Usain Bolt is so fast I saw a Cheetah giving him a High 5.
Two girl sprinters are training for the 100 metres race. One says to the other: "You won't believe this, but I've just run 100 metres in 10 seconds." The other says: "But that's impossible, that's the world record." So the other says: "Ah hah, but I took a short cut."
Who was the fastest runner? Adam. He was first in the human race.
Light was heard saying to his son, "Keep practicing and one day you will be faster than the speed of Usain."
Why did the bald man take up running? To get some fresh 'air.