Joke #12092

Q: What do you call Santa Claus with muscles? A: Mr. XMass

No time for gym? Please tell me how you watch 3 hours of TV every night.

Q: Why did the bodybuilder buy tape from the hardware store? A: Somebody told him he was ripped!

Yo momma is so poor for Christmas she got a box, put two sticks on it, spun it and said son here's your xbox 360.

Jesus said to John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." He came fifth and received a toaster.

Q: What did the deaf, blind, mute girl get for Christmas? A: Cancer.

I don't always go to the gym, but when I do, I make sure Facebook knows about it.

Rudolph the well hung reindeer, Had a great enormous cock, All he could ever do with it, was beat it off inside a sock, All of the female reindeer, Had pussies that were just too small, Poor old well hung Rudolph, Could not get any sex at all, Then one horny Christmas eve, Santa came to say, "Rudolph with your cock so strong... Fuck my arsehole all night long!" Then all the reindeer loved him, A few of them were heard to say, "Rudolph the well hung reindeer... You're so lucky Santa's gay"

If you really want to loosen your pectineus, you should skip the squats and let me stretch them out.

I quit my gym this morning because one of the instructors started shouting at me, "Come on man, you've got to want it! Come on push. You can do it." I hate being disturbed when I'm having a dump.

What did one Christmas tree say to the other? You've got a lot of balls walking in here dressed like that.