Joke #12105

What did the big angel say to the little angel on Christmas Eve? Answer: "Halo there!"

While I was working as a store Santa, a boy asked me for an electric train set. "If you get your train," I told him, "your dad is going to want to play with it too. Is that all right?" The boy became very quiet. So, moving the conversation along, I asked, "What else would you like Santa to bring you?" He promptly replied, "Another train."

If Santa comes down the chimney this year and tries to stuff you in his sack, don't worry, because I wished for you for Christmas.

Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and its still printing.

"Hey Bill... Do you talk to your wife while you are having sex?" "Only if there's a phone handy", Bill replied.

In some quarters, bookstores may be considered dinosaurs, but odd customers are evergreen, as these requests to bookstore clerks prove. "Can you tell me who the author of Shakespeare is?" "I'm looking for a book, but I only know the title, not the author. It's called Dante's Inferno." "I definitely don't want nonfiction. I like autobiographies and history." "Do you have Shakespeare in English?"

Client: "Please remove the unnecessary circle at the end of the sentence." Me: "You mean... the period?" Client: "I don't care what you designers call it; it is unsightly. Delete it."

This Christmas, Santa is sending a message to the naughty children to stop being bad. He stuffing their stocking with Chuck Norris!

Your moms like a christmass tree all the guys put there balls on her.

Yo mama so dumb that when she looked in a mirror she yelled stop copying me.

When somebody is totally angry, why not say: "Yes, young Skywalker. Come over to the dark side of the Force."