Joke #14287

A: "What is your biggest fear?" B: "Being forgotten, what's yours?" B: "Hello" B: "?"

Why are niggers afraid of chainsaws? Because when you turn on a chainsaw it says "Run nigga nigga nigga Run nigga nigga nigga"

Q: What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A: A dino-snore!

A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw an unusually beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized she was heading straight toward his seat. Lo and behold, she took the seat right beside his. Eager to strike up a conversation, he blurted out, "Business trip or vacation?" She turned, smiled and said, "Business. I'm going to the Annual Sexual Studies Convention in Chicago". He swallowed hard. Here was the gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting next to him and she was going to a meeting about sexual studies! Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, "What's your business role at this convention?" "Lecturer," she responded. "I use my extensive personal experience to share interesting facts about sexuality. "Really," he gulped,"like what?" "Well," she explained, "For instance, Native American Indians are the most passionate. While Jewish men are the most likely to satisfy a woman fully. And in terms of lasting the longest, surprisingly it's the Southern redneck." Suddenly, the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed. "I'm sorry," she said, "I shouldn't really be discussing this with you. I don't even know your name." "Um, Tonto Goldstein. But my friends call me Bubba."

Is it still rape if you yell 'Surprise!' first?

I know an archaeologist who can tell you what period a tampon was from.

A woman noticed her husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach. "Ha­­! That's not going to help," she said. "Sure, it does," he said. "It's the only way I can see the numbers."

Johny has lately written a short email to his brother while asking him only one question in this email: Hi brother, I am writing to you, I only would like to know, tell me: How is your fianceé? The Johny´s brother reply was only: Hi John, her brother is doing well.

A guy rang up to air port and said: "Do you mind me please to ask how long is from New York to Sanfransico? The lady replied "A moment..." Then the guy said "Thank you" and ceased conversation.

My wife told me, "Don't get upset if someone calls you fat." "You're much bigger than that."

Chuck Norris is a man of few words. Chuck Norris is not a man of few roundhouse kicks to the face.