Joke #3232

The man pulled over to the side of the road when he saw the police lights in his rear view mirror. “How long have you been riding around without a tail light?” asked the officer. “Oh, no!” screamed the man, jumping out of the car. “Calm down, it isn’t that serious.” said the officer. “Wait’ll my family finds out.” “Where’s your family?” “They’re in the trailer that was hitched to the car!”
Vote: has 75.66 % from 49 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

On a beach a man shouts at another man: Tell your son not to imitate me. A man to his son: Son, stop playing the fool.
Vote: has 67.78 % from 36 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
A man goes to a bar and sees a fat girl dancing on a table. He walks over to her and says, "Wow, nice legs!" She is flattered and replies, "You really think so?" The man says, "Oh definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now."
Vote: has 80.50 % from 75 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
A group of Americans were traveling by tour bus through Holland. As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goat's milk was used. She showed the group a lively hillside where many goats were grazing. "These," she explained, "are the older goats put out to pasture when they no longer produce." She then asked, "What do you do in America with your old goats?" A spry old gentleman answered, "They send us on bus tours!"
Vote: has 79.96 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, travel, animal, food, age
Boy asks his Gran nervously, "have you seen my pills ... they were labeled LSD ?" Gran replies "fuck your pills ! Have you seen the dragon in the kitchen ?!"
Vote: has 78.15 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, drug
What do you call a Labrador that becomes a magician? A Labracadabrador!
Vote: has 73.89 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
I am often asked, "Is google a man or a women?" My simple answer is: It's a woman because it won't let you finish your sentence without making a suggestion.
Vote: has 71.76 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, internet
One attractive young businesswoman to another over lunch: "My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying."
Vote: has 60.66 % from 41 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, business, women, math, time
Willow Smith is 11 and has a tongue ring, half her head shaved and is bisexual. She needs to go live with her Aunty and Uncle in Bel-Air.
Vote: has 49.61 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, age, kids, celebrity
An 80 year old man was having his annual checkup when the doctor asked how he was feeling. "I've never been better!" he boasted. "I've got an 18 year old bride who's pregnant and having my child! What do you think about that?" The doctor considered this for a moment, then said, "Let me tell you a story. I knew a guy who was an avid hunter. He never missed a season. But one day he went out in a bit of a hurry and accidentally grabbed his umbrella instead of his gun." The doctor continued, "So he was in the woods and suddenly a grizzly bear appeared in front of him! He raised up his umbrella, pointed it at the bear and squeezed the handle. And do you know what happened?" the doctor queried. Dumbfounded, the old man replied, "No, what?" The doctor continued, "The bear dropped dead in front of him." "That's impossible!" exclaimed the old man. "Someone else must of shot the bear." "That's kind of what I'm getting at," replied the doctor.
Vote: has 86.02 % from 124 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, age, doctor, kids
My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished two bags of chips and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.
Vote: has 74.54 % from 66 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, food, doctor