How do you change a blonde’s mind?
Blow in her ear.
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A blonde was cruising down the highway at breakneck speed when a cop pulled her over.
“May I see your license and registration, please?” asked the cop.
Miffed, the blonde said, “I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you took away my license. Now today you want me to show it to you!”
Q. Why is a blonde like a door knob?
A. Because everybody gets a turn.
What did the blonde say when she found out that she was pregnant?
I hope it's not mine.
How can you tell if a blonde sends you a fax?
It has a stamp on it.
Walking through Chinatown, a tourist is fascinated with all the Chinese restaurants, shops, signs and banners.
He turns a corner and sees a building with the sign, "Hans Olaffsen’s Laundry."
"Hans Olaffsen?", he muses. "How the heck does that fit in here?"
So he walks into the shop and sees an old Chinese gentleman behind the counter.
The tourist asks, "How did this place get a name like 'Hans Olaffsen’s Laundry?'"
The old man answers, "Is name of owner."
The tourist asks, "Well, who and where is the owner?"
"Me, is right here," replies the old man.
"You? How did you ever get a name like Hans Olaffsen?"
"Is simple," says the old man. "Many, many year ago when come to this country, was stand in line at Documentation Center. Man in front was big blonde Swede. Lady look at him and go, 'What your name?'
He say, 'Hans Olaffsen.'
Then she look at me and go, 'What your name?'
I say, 'Sem Ting.'"
Q. What's five miles long and has an IQ of forty?
A. A blonde parade.
How do you guess a blond played at you’re computer?
The joystick is on the chair.
What do you call a smart blonde?
There is only two simple little words to describe this joke and that is: A miracle
Q: Why can't a blonde dial 911?
A: She can't find the eleven.