What do you get from a cow on the North Pole?
Cold cream.
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What's a teddy bears favourite pasta?
Tagliateddy.
What is the definition of revenge?
A baby with a dog in its mouth.
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When Chuck Norris got stung by a bee, the Bee had an allergic reaction called Chuck Norris.
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What is the most important use for cowhide?
To hold the cow together.
How are skunks able to avoid danger?
By using their instinks and common scents.
A skunk family had two little skunks they called In and Out.
One day little In disappeared. Mother Skunk, Father Skunk and young Out spent hours looking for him, getting more worried all the time.
In the end the parents went home to have a cup of tea, but Out said he d continue searching for a while.
Half an hour later he returned home, with a tired In following behind him.
"However did you find him?" asked Father Skunk.
"In-stinct," replied Out.
Why couldnt the teddy bear eat any more thanksgiving dinner?
He was already stuffed!
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How about we spank each other and call ourselves even?
A turtle is crossing the road when he's mugged by two snails.
When the police show up, they ask him what happened.
The shaken turtle replies, "I don't know. It all happened so fast."