Chuck Norris Turns his grass emo so it will cut itself.
Chuck Norris became a firefighter, after hearing of his decision fire ceased to be an element.
Chuck Norris hit a home run in a football game.
How do elephants hide in the jungle? Paint their balls red and pretend they are cherries! What's the loudest noise in the jungle? Monkeys eating cherries...
Q: What is the difference between a chicken and a turkey? A: Chickens celebrate Thanksgiving!
A little boy was so exited because his mom told him he is getting a baby brother. He repeated that to his techer every day, when he came to school, "Im getting a brother." One day his mom alllowed him to feel the baby's kicks in her belly. The next day he came to school and didnt say anything to his teacher, so the teacher asked him, what happend to his brother. He replyed, "I think mommy ate him."
Chuck Norris doesn't use a fire extinguisher to put out fires... he just tells the fire to stop burning.
What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Translator.
Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
Chuck Norris DNA is classified.