Chuck Norris can run so fast he can cause time travel.
Where do Danish cows come from? Cowpenhagenf.
How are tigers like sergeants in the army? They both wear stripes.
Hip-Hop is dead because of Chuck Norris.
Mama bear to Papa bear: "Well... You might call it hibernating — I call it goofing off ."
Q: How do you describe 3 prostitutes and a blonde? A: Ho, Ho, Ho, and to all a good night.
What's the best thing about a Siamese twin baby? Threesomes.
Two women are digging in the garden. One pulls out a foot-long carrot. She says, "This one reminds me of my husband." The second woman says, "Your husband's is that long?" "No that dirty."
Q: Why does a dog stay in a shadow. A: Because it doesn't want to be a Hotdog.
A Jewish guy got in a taxi cab...5 min into a ride the driver notice a man beating up a woman on the other side of the street. The driver rush to the scene. He open the door ran out as soon as he did that the Jewish guy roll down his window as fast as he can and shouted, "Stop it, stop it, stop the meter."