I've been trying to find the right time to tell my pet hes adopted...
What is the difference between a man and a catfish?
One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is a fish.
What's gray and powdery?
Instant Elephant.
What did the frog say to the fly?
You are really starting to bug me!
The little snail begs for his mother:
Mother, please let me pass the rail road!
Thunder dear, not now.
In five hours the train passes.
In what type of weather is the vet the busiest?
When its raining cats and dogs.
Why do moths fly with their legs open?
Cause they've got huge mothballs!
How come sharks don’t attack lawyers?
From professional courtesy.
What do you call a dinosaur with magic powers?
Tyrannosaurus Hex.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
It was the chicken's day off.