Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
It was the chicken's day off.
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Q: What's the difference between Yo' Mama and a hippo?
A: One has a big mouth and a fat ass. The other lives in rivers in tropical countries.
What do you get if you cross a skunk and a dinosaur?
A stinkasaurus.
What did the judge say when the skunk was on trial?
Odour in court.
Two neighbors are talking to each other.
First neighbor: Do you know that my dog is so smart, he waits for the newspaper to drop at the doorstep and then delivers it to me?
Second neighbor: Of course, I know that very well.
First neighbor: Really, well then, how?
Second neighbor: My dog came and told me.
I hear you take milk baths.
That's right.
Why?
I can't find a cow tall enough for a shower.
What do you call an operation on a rabbit?
A hare-cut.
Chuck Norris is the most feared predator on the planet.
That's why sharks have a Chuck Norris week.
Vote:
A panda bear walks into a restaurant and orders a sandwich.
When he receives the sandwich he eats it and then shoots the waiter and leaves the restaurant.
A policeman sees the panda and tells him he just broke the law.
The panda bear tells the policeman that he's innocent and, if he didn't believe him, to look in the dictionary.
The policeman gets a dictionary and looks up "panda bear."
It says, "Panda Bear: eats shoots and leaves."
What magazine makes cows stampede to the newsstand?
Cows-mopolitan!