The best disgusting jokes

Q: What compliment do you NOT want from a midget? A: Wow! Your hair smells good!
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

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What do you call a chocolate Easter bunny that was out in the sun too long? A runny bunny.
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More jokes about: animal, food, easter, chocolate, disgusting
Question: If you went to a party and woke up with a condom in your ass would you tell anyone? Answer: No! Response: Wanna go to a party?
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More jokes about: disgusting, party, sex
Q: What do you get when you mix beans and onions? A: Tear gas.
Vote: has 62.22 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, food
A married couple go to a restaurant. A blonde waitress takes their order and returns several minutes later, carrying a plate with only a plain hamburger bun on it. The man asks, "Where's the burger?" The waitress lifts her arm and pulls out a burger from her armpit. "I was keeping it warm," she replies. The wife says, "Please cancel my hot dog order."
Vote: has 62.22 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, marriage, food, blonde, dog
Q: What's the similarity between a woman and dog poop? A: The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
Vote: has 62.14 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, women, age
Mommy, mommy, I don't want to visit grandma today! "Shut up and keep digging, boy."
Vote: has 62.14 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

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Say, "Do I smell popcorn?" right after you fart. So everybody takes a big whiff.
Vote: has 61.89 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting
At a restaurant, one of the customers notices that all of the waiters have two spoons in their vest pockets. A waiter explains, "We see that the most frequently dropped silverware is spoons, therefore we keep them for replacement." Then the customer notices a string hanging out of all the waiters' flies. "The string is for us to go to the bathroom," explains the waiter. "That way, when we pull it, it shoots and aims straight, and we don't need to use our hands." The customer asks, "Well, that's how you get it out, but how do you get it back in?" The waiter replies, "Well, that's another reason we carry the spoons."
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, food, animal
Birdie, birdie in the sky Dropped some white stuff in my eye, I'm a big girl I won't cry, I'm just glad that cows don't fly.
Vote: has 61.25 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, bird, animal, poems