A father and his son, Bobby, arrive at the local Rugby match and Dad can't find the tickets.
Dad: "Nip home and see if I left the tickets there."
Bobby: "No probs, Dad."
Half an hour later Bobby returns to his dad who is patiently waiting outside the stadium.
Bobby: "Yep, they're on the kitchen table where you left them."
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A man is participating in a golf tournament.
He was left to golf with just his caddy.
On his tee-off, the golfer's ball lands in a patch of buttercups.
The caddy tells the golfer he can take the ball onto the course, and he won't take a one stroke penalty.
However, the golfer refuses and takes the ball out of the buttercups and takes the stroke penalty.
Suddenly, Mother Nature appears.
"What you just did was amazing. I am so proud that you enjoy nature and all of its beauty. For your reward, I will give you a lifetime supply of butter."
"Thanks," says the man.
"But where were you last week when my ball landed in the pussywillows?"
Did you hear about the blonde who after watching the ballerinas, wondered why they didn't get taller girls?
Why is there no mexican olympics?
Because everyone who can run, jump, or swim is already across the boarder.
Chuck Norris was banned from the Olympics because his mere presence is considered a performance-enhancing substance.
Vote:
There’s no game like golf: you go out with three friends, play eighteen holes, and return with three enemies.
Q:Why don't hockey players drink tea?
A:Because the Canadiens and Red Wings have all the cups.
While giving a physical, a doctor notices that his patient’s shins are covered in dark, savage bruises.
‘Tell me,’ says the doctor.
‘Do you play hockey or soccer?’
‘No,’ said the man. ‘But my wife and I play bridge.’
Q:Why is basketball the grossest sport there is?
A:Because they dribble all over the court.
Q: What do you get when a dinosaur scores a touchdown?
A: A dino-score.
Micheal Jordan to Chuck Norris:
I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours.
Can you?
Chuck Norris: (laughs) How do you think the earth spins?
Vote: