In honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be "Norrisized".
Getting your ass kicked by Chuck Norris? The only good news is you know when you will die.
What's the last thing that goes through your mind when you fight Chuck Norris? His foot.
Chuck Norris can play Bach's 9th Symphony with a triangle.
Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Chuck Norris.
Only once in history has Chuck Norris snapped his fingers, scientists call it The Big Bang.
Chuck Norris doesn't tie shoelaces, he wins them.
Chuck Norris is cooler than the other side of the pillow.
If you want to commit suicide, all you need to do is say,"Chuck Norris is a loser."
Stores accept Monopoly money from Chuck Norris.
If you make a list of 10 things Chuck Norris cannot do, he will appear at your house and perform them all. Your life may be forfeit.