Santa Clause doesn't watch you sleep but Chuck Norris does.
The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real. It's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
This Christmas, Santa is sending a message to the naughty children to stop being bad. He stuffing their stocking with Chuck Norris!
Santa writes to Chuck Norris about what he wants for Christmas.
Santa Claus asks Chuck Norris for presents.
The song Santa Claus is Coming To Town was originaly called Chuck Norris is Coming To Town. They changed it so the children wouldn't live in fear.
Count Dracula once bit Chuck Norris and immediately turned vegetarian.
Santa delivers to Chuck Norris' house first.
The Grinch steals Christmas from Santa, Chuck Norris steals Christmas from the Grinch.
Santa Clause, The Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy were all real at one time... then they met Chuck. There can only be 1 living legend.
Santa leaves out cookies for Chuck Norris.