I thought I told you to lose weight. Says the coach. What happened to your three week diet that I told you to keep? Well, I finished it in three days!
How do you entertain a blonde? tell her to find a corner in a circle room
Three blondes enter a bar. They are happy, dancing and singing. The barman asks them: What are you girls celebrating? We just finished a puzzle that took us tree months to finish. So? The barman asks. On the box wrought 2-4 years!
Question: Why is a laundromat a really bad place to pick up women? Answer: Because a woman who can’t even afford a washing machine will never be able to support you.
Why do lions always eat raw meat? "Because they don't know how to cook."
Linux is like a wigwam: no windows, no gates, apache inside...
A ship with 30 sailors and one woman strands on a desert island. After one month the woman says: "I can not proceed in this way." And she suicides herself. After another month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they bury the woman. The next month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they dig up the woman.
Q:What did the black girl say while having sex? A:Dad get off me your crushing my ciggs.
One day Pebbles Flintstone got scared and hopped in bed with Wilma and Fred. She looked under the covers on Wilma's side and asked what that was and Wilma said well Pebbles thas my rock. After that Pebbles looked on Fred's side and asked what that thing was down there and Fred replied thats my rock grinder. So Pebbles layed there for a few minutes then sat up and said so mommy puts her rock in daddy's rock grinder and out pops PEBBLES! ! ! !
Q: What did the fool do with his first 50 cent piece? A: He Married Her