Once a programmer drowned in the sea. Many Marines where at that time on the beach, but the programmer was shouting "F1 F1" and nobody understood it.
What is a cursor? Someone having computer problems.
A programmer had a problem. He decided to use Java. He now has a ProblemFactory.
What did one computer say to the other? 010101101010101010101
The computer programmer to his son: "Here, I brought you a new basketball." Son: "Thank you, daddy, but where is the user's guide?"
Two programmers after work, talking in a pub: "You will never believe me when I tell you what happened to me yesterday. I met a very nice blonde in a bar." - And what did you do ? "I invited her to my place, we had some drinks and then the girl asked me to undress her." "Are you kidding me ? And what did you do then?" "I got her blouse and her dress off and then i got her to sit on my office, right next to my new laptop." "Oh, you got a new laptop. What model and what are its specifications?"
A Help desk guy speaking to a lady user... Help desk: Double click on "My Computer". Lady: I can't see your computer... Help desk: No... click on "My Computer" on your computer. Lady: How the hell can I click on your computer from my computer?! Help desk: There is an icon labelled "My Computer" on your computer... double click on it... Lady: What the hell is your computer doing on my computer?
A group of computer science geeks were listening to a lecture about Java programming at a university. After the lecture, one of the men leaned over and grabbed a woman’s breast. Woman: Hey! That’s private OK ? The man hesitated for a second looking confused. Man: But I thought we were in the same class.
99 little bugs in the code, 99 bugs in the code, 1 bug fixed... Compile again, 100 little bugs in the code.
Smash forehead on keyboard to continue…
How many prolog programmers does it take to change a lightbulb? Yes.