Joke #9231

Q: What is height of De-hydration? A: A cow giving milk powder.
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has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal

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Make the world your playground. Whenever you miss the sandbox, cover it up. Dragging a sock over it helps. If you can't get your way, lay across the keyboard till you do. When you are hungry, meow loudly so they feed you just to shut you up. Always find a good patch of sun to nap in. Nap often. When in trouble, just purr and look cute. Life is hard, and then you nap. Curiosity never killed anything except maybe a few hours. Variety is the spice of life. One day, ignore people; the next day, annoy them, and play with them when they're busy. Climb your way to the top, that's why the curtains are there. Make your mark in the world, or at least spray in each corner. Always give generously; a bird or rodent left on the bed tells them, "I care".
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
What are four hundred rabbits hopping backwards? A receding hare line.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: What do you get when you cross donkey DNA with an onion? A: A piece of ass that will bring tears to your eyes.
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
Q: What do women and cats have in common? A: Pussy farts.
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has 32.94 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting, fart, women
A man is out walking in New York when he sees a girl being savaged by a fierce dog. He fights off the dog by beating about the head with a stick and saves the girl's life. The girl's mother rushes over to him: "Thank you, thank you, you are a hero, tomorrow all the newspapers will have headlines about Brave New Yorker Saves the Life of Young Girl" "But I'm not a New Yorker," the man says. "Oh, then it will say in all the newspapers Brave American Saves Life of Young Girl," says the mother. "But I'm not an American," the man says. "What are you then?" asks the mother. "I'm an Iranian," the man says. The next day he sees the newspaper headlines: Islamic Extr*mist kills American Dog.
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has 75.28 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, dog, life
Birdie, birdie in the sky Dropped some white stuff in my eye, I'm a big girl I won't cry, I'm just glad that cows don't fly.
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has 60.48 % from 121 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, disgusting, poems
How can you tell that elephants have been doing it in your garage? All your Hefty Bags are missing.
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has 29.01 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: animal
The mouse and the elephant stay on the trunk of a smitten tree. Near them passes the giraffe, who asks them: Who pulled out this tree from his root? Me off course, says the mouse, but the elephant helped a bit.
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has 19.69 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: animal
What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk? An udder failure.
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
What do a walrus and Tupperware have in common? They both like a tight seal.
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has 73.48 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: animal, life