Q: What's the easiest way to a persons heart? A: Chuck Norris' fist
Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris roundhoused a guy so hard he starved to death before he stopped sliding.
Chuck Norris doesn't run out of patience, patience runs out of him from fear of a roundhouse kick to the face.
Chuck Norris sends paper letters through email.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
When Chuck Norris visits Europe on vacation, France surrenders.
Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.
Chuck Norris can skydive into outer space.
Chuck Norris can comment on Facebook posts, before you publish them.
Obama's health care plan won't cover injuries caused by a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to the face. Nobody would survive anyway.