Chuck Norris can suck a black hole.
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Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel.
Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need to wear steel toes, his toes already are.
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Chuck Norris has no freezer. He stares at food and they freeze with fear.
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When chuck Norris was in school, he made his PE teacher run laps.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he taught his parents to stay away from strangers.
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A kid once tried to scare Chuck Norris on Halloween... sadly he has had the hiccups now for 40 years.
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Superman is weakened when exposed to Kryptonite.
Chuck Norris eats Kryptonite for breakfast without even a belch.
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The first paper money press was invented when Chuck Norris drew a design under his boot and stepped on a tree.
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When Chuck Norris works out, he doesn't sweat.
His body cries.
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Before sliced bread, people used to say "That's the greatest thing since Chuck Norris".
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