Chuck Norris can find the end of a circle.
Chuck Norris has only played Pacman twice, and beat the game both times. The ghosts were too afraid to leave their little box to try to stop him.
Koala: What do you mean, I'm not a bear? I have all the koalafications. Elephant: Your koalafications are completely irrelephant. Lion: Don't listen to him! He's lion! Bear: This arguing is becoming unbearable!
The average man is proof enough that women can take a joke.
One day 2 blondes walked into a tanning salon. One blonde said, " A tan for 2 please!" The cashier said, " Ok," filled out a form for them and asked, "are you two sisters?" They chuckled and replied, " No, we aren't even Catholic."
Across all of the infinite number of parallel universes the version of Chuck Norris is the same. Nature knows perfection when she sees it.
Chuck Norris' beard can shave a razor.
The Guinness Book of World Records is actually Chuck Norris' elementary school report card.
Chuck Norris destroyed all life in a place called Happy Valley. We know it today as Death Valley.
Chuck Norris can make ice cubes with a microwave.