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Chuck Norris can find the end of a circle.
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Chuck Norris has only played Pacman twice, and beat the game both times. The ghosts were too afraid to leave their little box to try to stop him.
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Koala: What do you mean, I'm not a bear? I have all the koalafications. Elephant: Your koalafications are completely irrelephant. Lion: Don't listen to him! He's lion! Bear: This arguing is becoming unbearable!
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The average man is proof enough that women can take a joke.
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One day 2 blondes walked into a tanning salon. One blonde said, " A tan for 2 please!" The cashier said, " Ok," filled out a form for them and asked, "are you two sisters?" They chuckled and replied, " No, we aren't even Catholic."
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Across all of the infinite number of parallel universes the version of Chuck Norris is the same. Nature knows perfection when she sees it.
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Chuck Norris' beard can shave a razor.
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The Guinness Book of World Records is actually Chuck Norris' elementary school report card.
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Chuck Norris destroyed all life in a place called Happy Valley. We know it today as Death Valley.
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Chuck Norris can make ice cubes with a microwave.
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