In "ring around the rosie", Chuck Norris does not fall down.
On the show Man v.s Wild, when they talk about the profesionals that Bear recieves help from, they are refering to Chuck Norris.
If he wanted to, Chuck Norris could rob a bank. By phone.
Chuck Norris doesn't think he's better than everyone, everyone thinks Chuck Norris is better than them.
Q: How many Chuck Norris\' does it take to screw in a lightbulb? \r\nA: None. Chuck Norris can see in the dark.
When Chuck Norris plays hangman, he decides what the word is.
"I’m in a big trouble!" "Why is that?" "I saw a mouse in my house!" "Oh, well, all you need to do is use a trap." "I don’t have one." "Well then, buy one." "Can’t afford one." "I can give you mine if you want." "That sounds good." "All you need to do is just use some cheese in order to make the mouse come to the trap." "I don’t have any cheese." "Okay then, take a piece of bread and put a bit of oil in it and put it in the trap." "I don’t have oil." "Well, then put only a small piece of bread." "I don’t have bread." "Then what is the mouse doing at your house?"
What is a cow's favorite lunch meat? Bullogna.
Chuck Norris once gave a man an apple. Today that man is known as Steve Jobs.
Three fans were bemoaning the sorry state of their football team. "I blame the general manager," said the first fan. "If he signed better players, we'd be a great team." "I blame the players," said the second fan. "If they made more of an effort, we'd score some points." "I blame my parents," said the third. "If I'd been born in Seattle, I'd be supporting a decent team."