An elderly retired couple went to a doctor.
The man said, "We want to know if we are making love properly.
Will you look at us?" "Go ahead," said the doctor. They made love.
"You are making love perfectly," the doctor said.
"That will be $10."
They came back six weeks in a row and did the same thing.
On the seventh visit the doctor said, "What are you coming here like this for - I told you that you are making love properly!"
"She can't come to my house," said the man, "and I can't go to her house.
A motel costs $20.
You charge us $10 and we get $8 back from Medicare."
Vote:
Chuck Norris can create tornados by running around in circles.
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A rather obese man is very excited about his new job and wants to start work immediately.
However, when he sits down at his computer, the only program installed was spreadsheets.
Confused, the man calls over his boss and asks:"Why there is only excel installed on this computer?"
His boss replies, "It was the only program in your size!"
Chuck Norris could catch that damn acorn in those ICE AGE movies!
Vote:
When Chuck Norris visits Egypt, the sand didn't burn his feet, his feet burnt the sand, hence the discovery of glass.
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4-year-old: Why are you my dad?
Me: Because I made you.
4: How?
Me: ...
4: O.o
Me: ...
4: O.O
Me: With Legos.
Chuck Norris has stared Fear in the face... and Fear looked away.
Vote:
If you click on start, run, then type in Chuck Norris you will get a permanent blue screen of death.
Vote:
Batman is to Robin as Chuck Norris is to Death.
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Hi, my name is "Milk." I'll do your body good.